Shabbes in Niagara!

My beloved S.G. and I had the opportunity to spend Shabbes at the brand new (as of Rosh HaShana) Chabad House in St. Catharines. Formerly, Chabad was centred out of Niagara Falls, but the new location is much better on a lot of levels (bigger, closer to Brock University, closer to a larger Jewish population, etc.).

I’ve had the sincere pleasure of knowing R’ Zalman Zaltzman (the local Chabad Rabbi) and his wonderful wife, Perla, for about 5 years ever since they first came to the region. They are a wonderful dedicated couple who have devoted their lives to Jewish education, community and spreading the Rebbe‘s message and vision to as many Jews as they can.

(Perla and Zalman Zaltzman, the Chabad representatives in the Niagara Region)

While we originally thought it was going to be just a (relatively) small group of people, when I arrived at about 4:00 pm Friday afternoon, the place was already starting to fill up. The Rabbi and his wife invited about a half-dozen Brock University students to dinner Friday evening and a few members of the local Jewish community. Also attending were R’ Zaltzman’s parents and several of his brothers and sisters.

All in all, there were 25 of us that night! Shabbes dinner was so amazing (thank you Perla!) and the conversation inspiring and enlightening.

The next day, after morning prayers, I had the wonderful experience of talking/studying with a 13-year-old Chabad student who is a brilliant Torah scholar. It was incredible seeing such insight and depth of understanding in one so young. I was completely blown away.

(The Chabad Hanukah menorah erected each year as part of the Niagara Falls ‘Festival of Lights’)

Lunch was late (starting around 2:00 pm) and very leisurely with lots of uplifting stories and enjoyable conversation.

All too soon, it was time for havdalah, and before we knew it, Shabbes was over.

If you are Jewish and are in the Niagara Region of southern Ontario, do yourself a favour and contact Chabad Lubavitch Jewish Centre of Niagara. It will be an experience you will not soon forget.

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Science Headlines that Tickle Me!

While packing to go off on a bit of a Festivus vacation and spend some time with my dear SigOth, SG, I kept browsing the science sites.

Here is a small sampling of some of the more amusing titles out there today, all of them legit!

Scientists Discover Deep-Fried Planets!

Whole New Meaning for Thinking on your Feet: Brains of Small Spiders Overflow into Legs!

Infectious Fungus, Thought to be Asexual, Isn’t!

Was Saint Paul Struck Blind and Converted by Lightning?

Robots Interact, Snub Humans!

How to Break Murphy’s Law!

Why We Feel Nostalgic During the Holidays!

Evolution of Genitals: Shape Matters More than Size!

And they say scientists are boring!

Kosher Samurai is shutting down for the holidays!

We’ll be back in the first week of January.

Have a wonderful holiday season.

Happy Hanukah, Happy Festivus,

Merry Xmas and a very Happy New Year!!

Sincerely, The Kosher Samurai

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Samurai Values: Chūgi (Loyalty)

Samurai Values:

CHŪGI

(Loyalty)

[Faithfulness. Devotion. Trustworthiness]

Lesson: Warriors are responsible for everything that they have done and everything that they have said, and all of the consequences that follow. They are immensely loyal to all of those in their care.

Meditation: To everyone for whom they are responsible, they remain fiercely true.

Musings: Loyalty is one of the most important qualities that a true Warrior possesses.  One must have unshakable fealty and trustworthiness to those one serves and owes allegiance. Warriors must also demonstrate steadfast faithfulness and devotion to those under their protection, regardless of their station in life. The single-minded faithfulness of a Warrior is unswerving and cannot ever be put in question. The Samurai were true even to the point of death and countless gave their lives zealously defending those to whom they pledged their loyalty.

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The text I use for the Lesson and Mediation comes from the Bushido Seven page on the website of the Traditional Karate Centre in Wilmette, IL, USA. They own the copyright. The rest of the essay is compiled from my own meagre musings on the subject.

On the first Friday of each month, I hope to post another Samurai Value. Traditionally, there are seven bushido virtues in all, so if everything goes as planned, this will take us from June to December.

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Why Our Brains Make Us Laugh

Wandering, as I am wont to do, along the littered, soft gravel shoulders of the information superhighway, I stumbled across an interesting article last week in the online edition of The Boston Globe. The article’s title, in part, reads…

My first thought was, “Why do we need or even want to know why the brain makes us laugh?” Let’s face it. Nothing ruins a joke more than trying to explain it.

(Renaissance Jocularity)

The Boston Globe article states…

He who laughs last usually has to have the joke explained. But then why bother? After all, nothing kills humor faster than analysis… It’s just a joke: Don’t overthink it. But what if humor (or mirth, in research speak) is intimately linked to thinking? What if we’d have trouble thinking without it? That’s the argument of “Inside Jokes: Using Humor to Reverse-Engineer the Mind” (MIT Press, 2011).

As someone (supposedly Johnny Carson) once put it, “Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog. You can open it up, examine it and figure out exactly how it works… but the frog rarely survives the process.” [1]

(Is this some kind of joke??)

Hard as it might be to believe by reading my present material, in my early years I took comedy quite seriously. Seriously enough, in fact, to read Sigmund Freud’s publication on the topic, “Jokes and Their Relation to the Unconscious.” [2] So naturally, when I tripped over this article, I was intrigued by the idea of a study on how the mind processes humour.

The authors of “Inside Jokes” (you have to admit, it is kind of a cute title), begin from the idea that our brains try to make sense of our daily lives via a never-ending series of assumptions, based on sparse, incomplete information. All these best guesses simplify our world, give us critical insights into the minds of others, and streamline our decisions.

But mistakes are inevitable, and even a small faulty assumption can open the door to bigger and costlier mistakes. It is crucial, therefore, for the brain to constantly undertake a relentless ‘seek and destroy’ mission on as many of these self-induced errors as possible.

(aka Der Witz und seine Beziehung zum Unbewußten)

And it is at this point that humour comes in. Mirth… that little pulse of reward the brain gives itself for seeking out and correcting our mistaken assumptions. A sense of humor is the lure that keeps our brains alert for the gaps between our quick-fire assumptions and reality. As “Inside Jokes” argues, much of what we consider comedy takes advantage of this cognitive reflex, much as McDonald’s taps our evolved taste for high-energy food.

The brain is a complicated machine. Philosopher and cognitive scientist Daniel Clement Dennett once described human brains as “Chevy engines running Maserati software.”

(Brainwork, like the comedy business, is not funny)

Humans think prodigiously. In every situation, the human brain needs to constantly anticipate the future by making assumptions about the world that unfold at breakneck speed. This often results in errors. Finding and disabling these errors is a critical task. But it’s a resource-hungry job that has to compete with everything else our brains are doing. It’s very hard. And taxing. And not a lot of fun, really. So what’s in it for the brain? What’s the payoff for all the effort put into finding and correcting its own mistakes.

Well, basically, the brain has to bribe itself to do this important work. And how does it bribe itself? It bribes itself… by making the discovery of its own mistakes enjoyable. It makes it ‘funny.’

The pleasure of humor, the emotion of mirth, is the brain’s reward for discovering its mistaken inferences!

(Brilliant!)

But if a sense of humor is part of our basic, human thinking machinery, then why can’t we agree about what’s funny?

As co-author Hurley puts it, “What’s universal about humor is the process, not the content. Everybody faces every situation with different beliefs, knowledge, and understandings about the world. And different understandings lead to different assumptions and therefore different false assumptions.”

A sense of humour is more than just a valuable asset for a thinking being. It actually helps reduce the mistakes one makes and acts upon.

(These girls are improving the way their minds work!)

Well, there you have it, boys and girls… The ability to detect humor actually improves one’s chances at getting by in this world.

Who’d have thunk it?

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[1] I’ve since discovered the quote. “Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.”  E.B. White.

[2] Der Witz und seine Beziehung zum Unbewußten, published in 1905. Riveting stuff. No, really. It is. You should read it, if you are truly interested in humour and how the mind processes it.

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William Hamilton (and why I love his cartoons)

For those who have not yet had the pleasure, William Hamilton is a brilliant cartoonist. His works are most often found in The New Yorker magazine. He is also a lawyer and a playwright.  Few people capture the privileged preppy world as well as he.

(Post ‘Official Preppy Handbook’?… or maybe some downward social mobility?)

William Hamilton [1], in a very real way, got me through law school and my bar exams in terms of social interaction. He remains to this day my steadfast companion when I attend virtually any (non-Jewish) social functions, especially of a professional nature.

(The whole ‘Us’ and ‘Them’ aspect is an ongoing theme)

Hamilton’s cartoons shed light on what is, to most of us, a very closed segment of society. It is a world populated by preppies, high-society types, Park Avenue wives and daughters, corporate big wigs, business executives, high-end lawyers, and members of exclusive yacht clubs and country clubs.

(It’s when you overhear people actually talking like this that you ‘get’ Hamilton)

I was introduced to Hamilton the way most of his admirers were… through his New Yorker cartoons. I was still working in the theatre in those days, so many of the nuances of his humour went over my head. I experienced a similar situation later on when I began to follow Scott Adams’s Dilbert cartoons. It was only when I worked in a government agency where the office was set up in a standard ‘cube farm’ plan (i.e. many cubicles set up throughout the office space in a manner remeniscent of a petting zoo) that I truly ‘got’ his humour.

(Always a bit awkward in certain situations, I particularly enjoy the party cartoons)

Similarly, while I enjoyed Hamilton’s characters and situations  and admired his wit and gift for language, it wasn’t until I was put into a position where I had regular contact with a lot of preppies that I fully appreciated his work.

Other settings for Hamilton’s works include gentlemen’s clubs, office board rooms, cocktail parties, the insides of chauffeured limosines… anywhere where his people can let their sparkling dialogue glitter all the more.

(I often say this in court, regarding sentencing someone to ‘community service’)

Over the years, many Hamiltonianisms have crept into my conversation. I can’t help it. Sometimes I am in one situation or another, I open my mouth and out comes one of Hamilton’s snippets of dialogue line right out of the pages of The New Yorker magazine.

Here is a recent example…

I didn’t plan it. It just slipped out. It was tucked away in some ivy league corner of my brain and, at the right moment, sallied forth and presented itself. And, all credit to Mr. Hamilton, it got a positive response from those within earshot.

Here’s another one…

(Of course, the listener has to be old enough to get the reference)

Many of Hamilton’s best pieces revolve around introductions at parties, functions and get-togethers.

For those who’ve found Hamilton’s cartoons amusing, I highly recommend going over to The New Yorker magazine’s The Cartoon Bank and enjoying as much as you can stand.

Until then, I will leave you with some of my favourite Hamilton quips…

Of course you’re going to be depressed if you keep comparing yourself with successful people.

Old is when your daughter announces she’s seeing a younger man.

Someday, you may thank me for breaking what was becoming, in this family, a vicious cycle of inheritance.

You know, when I get over my thing for bad boys, Chip, you’re going to be one of the first to know.

I’ll see if he’s emotionally available.

She’s a Rolex. He’s a Timex.

Oh, God. Here comes the global-village idiot.

Boys, boys. You’re getting loud and no one gives a damn how big your salaries used to be.

I tried a slice of pizza yesterday, and frankly I don’t get it.

Frankly, what’s killing me about this marriage is realizing how entirely preventable it was.

Thank you, Mr. Hamilton, for making my life a better, wittier place.

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[1] Along with Lisa Birnbach, author of The Official Preppy Handbook and True Prep, and English writer P.G. Wodehouse, author of the Jeeves & Wooster novels and many other humourous books. After my call to the bar, screenwriter and director Whit Stilman rounded out my ‘social advisory committee.’ Without them, I would be lost.

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Shabbes at the Holy Adas Israel!

I had the pleasure of spending Shabbes at the Adas Israel Congregation of Hamilton, Ontario.

It’s been years since I was last at that shul. I’d forgotten how many wonderful people I know there.

The Kiddie-Winkers, my daughter Exhibit One and my son Exhibit Two, attended full-time hebrew day school at the Hamilton Hebrew Academy in the same building.

(R’ Eisenstein – ‘It’s a beautiful day!’)

Many of their former classmates are now getting married and beginning to plan families of their own.

I have a fair amount of my own history tied up there. So many people have come and gone who have had a profound influence on my life as a Jew. I will never forget them because they are a part of who I am today.

(R’ Zalman Itkin, a”h – a true mensch)

My dear friend, SG, and I arrived that afternoon. I drove in. She took a bus in from Toronto. Arrangements were made for us to stay with friends and colleagues.

We got together at minchah (afternoon) services in the small chapel. It was exactly as I remembered it. Kabbalat Shabbat… the service which brings in the Jewish Sabbath… was breathtaking and exciting. Unless you’ve experienced Friday night services at the Adas, you cannot truly appreciate the spiritual intensity and holiness that envelopes you in that small shul. Unlike some other synagogues, Friday night services there are packed with both men and women.

(R’ Morton Green – the heart and soul of the Adas)

The Adas is very welcoming and accepts Jews of all stripes. Friday night was a real spectrum of the observant Jewish community in Hamilton from converts to those ‘rediscovering’ Judaism to modern Orthodox ‘kippah serugah’ types to ‘black hat’ Litvishers to yeshiva boys to hasidim.

(The incomparable R’ Aharon Glaser)

SG and I enjoyed a lovely and spirit-filled dinner at the home of R’ Glaser and his family. In one of those special co-incidences, it turned out that both he and his wife met both of my children this summer. Mrs. Glaser met my son when her daughters attended the Jewish Camp Kadima (he ran the sports program) and R’ Glaser met my daughter in Jerusalem when she was studying at Aish HaTorah.

(R’ Dani Green – the spirit, inspiration and future of the Adas)

Shabbes morning, SG and I attended services. The dvar torah was given by the shul’s present Rabbi, R’ Dani Green, son of the former Rabbi, R’ Morton Green. His talk was, as always, inspiring, uplifting and meaningful. I met Dani when he was still in rabbinical school and we hit it off immediately. His father left big shoes to fill and, to his credit, Dani is doing a remarkable job. May he grow from strength to strength.

(My favourite family – The Lavins)

After doing a lot of catching up with old friends, SG and I went across the street for lunch with the Lavin family. There are a lot of people in this neighbourhood whom I love and admire but none more than the Lavins. They have opened their home and their hearts to me time and time again and they did not hold back on this occasion. When we came into their home, their middle daughter, T, said that she had something she needed to show me. She ran to her room and brought back an old beat-up and obviously well-used prayer book. She looked at me and said, “You gave me this prayer book when I was twelve years old and I have used it every day since!” She even showed me the inscription I wrote when I gave it to her many years ago. It was, for me, quite touching and moving. Lunch was fabulous with lots of lively and heated discussions about Torah, Judaism, life and, of course, T’s upcoming wedding. She kindly invited SG and me to attend and, G-d willing, next month we will all be together to celebrate this blessed event.

SG and I spent the evening at the Glaser home being charmed by their adorable daughters.

(R’ Aaron Selevan – a insightful talmudic scholar)

Sunday morning, I had the pleasure of sitting in on a study class conducted by R’ Selevan. His insights into Torah, Mishnah and Gemara open up an entire world of Judaism for me and those lucky enough to study with him.

After morning services, I went to R’ Glaser’s house to pick up SG, spend a morning with Mrs. Glaser and her daughters and take SG home to Toronto. Before we left, both girls blessed us with hand-made drawings for us to take home. The drawings are now ensconced in a place of honour on my fridge.

All in all, an awe-inspiring experience and one, G-d willing, we can do again soon.

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Samurai Values: Makoto (Honesty)

Samurai Values:

MAKOTO

(Honesty)

[Sincerity]

Lesson: When Warriors say that they will perform an action, it is as good as done. Nothing will stop them from completing what they say they will do. They do not have to “give their word.”  They do not have to “promise.”

Meditation: Speaking and doing are the same action.

Musings: A true Warrior must be truthful, honest and sincere. Those above and below rely and depend on the Warrior. Their lives are quite literally in the Warrior’s hands. There can be no room for dishonesty and insincerity. A true Warrior does not fear the Truth but rather lives by it.

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The text I use for the Lesson and Mediation come from the Bushido Seven page on the website of the Traditional Karate Centre in Wilmette, IL, USA. They own the copyright. The rest of the essay is compiled from my own meagre musings on the subject.

On the first Friday of each month, I hope to post another Samurai Value. Traditionally, there are seven bushido virtues in all, so if everything goes as planned, this will take us from June to December.

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Samurai Values: Jin (Benevolence)

Samurai Values:

JIN

(Benevolence)

[Kindness. Compassion]

Lesson: Through intense training and hard work, true Warriors become quick and strong. They are not as most people people. They develop a power that must be used for good. They have compassion. They help their fellow man at every opportunity.

Meditation: If an opportunity does not arise, they go out of their way to find one.

Musings: While one might not at first associate Warriors with such a quality, it is benevolence and a sense of kindness that prevents a Warrior from becoming a heartless, soulless killing machine. A Warrior’s power, strength, courage and fighting skill can be a monstrous thing if they are not tempered by compassion. A sense of goodwill and noblesse oblige moderates and balances the other qualities so that the true Warrior acts in the best interests of those above and below, and ultimately to society as a whole.

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The text I use for the Lesson and Mediation come from the Bushido Seven page on the website of the Traditional Karate Centre in Wilmette, IL, USA. They own the copyright. The rest of the essay is compiled from my own meagre musings on the subject.

On the first Friday of each month, I hope to post another Samurai Value. Traditionally, there are seven bushido virtues in all, so if everything goes as planned, this will take us from June to December.

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Damsels in Distress: A Whit Stillman film

Oy, I’m on shpilkes! [1]

I just found out that Whit Stillman, the man behind Metropolitan, Barcelona, and The Last Days of Disco, has a new movie which premiers this coming Tuesday (September 13, 2011) at the Toronto International Film Festival in the Visa Screening Room at 6:00 pm.

(Damsels in Distress – cast)

I will post the synopsis directly as I read it this morning on TheDailyBeast.com…

Queen bee Violet Wister (Greta Gerwig), uptight Rose (Megalyn Echikunwoke), and sexpot Heather (Carrie MacLemore) set out to revolutionize life at their East Coast liberal arts college in Whit Stillman’s comedy Damsels in Distress. The beautiful trio welcomes transfer student Lily (Analeigh Tipton) into their group, which aims to help suicidal students via musical dance numbers. Song and dance aside, the girls become romantically entangled with a series of men, including smooth-talking Charlie (Adam Brody), who threaten their friendship and mental stability. Stillman’s (Last Days of Disco) first movie in 13 years is slated to close the Venice Film Festival on Saturday before heading to Toronto. Though Gerwig admitted she initially struggled with the heavy and dry-witted dialogue, she told Collider.com, “I started saying very Whit Stillmany things as I was making it which I think was really annoying to my roommates.”

I am SO excited!

(Violet Wister, played by Greta Gerwig)

I cannot tell you how much I loved Stillman’s Metropolitan and what a profound effect it had on me. Along with Sofia Coppola’s Lost in Translation, it is a movie I watch about three or four times a year.

Here is a Damsels in Distress teaser trailer from Toronto Life!

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[1] Shpilkes (SHPILL-kiss). Yiddish [שפּילקעס] for ‘pins’, as in ‘pins and needles.’ Nervous energy usually from  anticipation.

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Samurai Values: Meiyo (Honor, Glory)

Samurai Values:

Meiyo

(Honor, Glory)

[Nobility]

Lesson: Warriors have only one judge of honour and character, and this is themselves. Decisions they make and how these decisions are carried out is a reflection of who they truly are.

Meditation: You cannot hide from yourself.

Musings: Honour is the crown a true Warrior wears. It is a sign of his nobility just as a royal robe or a scepter is a sign of monarchy. Without this virtue, a Warriors is nothing more than a highly trained killer, no different from any other soldier. Bushido in not merely a set of guidelines; it is a noble code of living! Without honour, however, everything unravels. Honour is what binds all the other qualities and what gives the true Warriors their nobility. Honour is what makes true Warriors stand straight and walk tall; it is they who hold themselves to this high standard. All glory due a true Warrior begins and ends with a deep sense of honour. A true Warrior will choose death rather than allow shame to besmirch such glory.

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The text I use for the Lesson and Mediation come from the Bushido Seven page on the website of the Traditional Karate Centre in Wilmette, IL, USA. They own the copyright. The rest of the essay is compiled from my own meagre musings on the subject.

On the first Friday of each month, I hope to post another Samurai Value. Traditionally, there are seven bushido virtues in all, so if everything goes as planned, this will take us from June to December.

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