Our Hearts are Breaking

Our Hearts are Breaking.

Boruch Dayan HaEmes.

May their neshamas have an aliyah.

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Gone for Passover!

Gone for Passover!

I will be away for the week of Passover.

 

This year, Passover starts Monday evening April 14.

I will return Wednesday April 23.

Have a happy Passover!

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Early Latke Recipe for an Extra Early Hanukah!

I just looked at my handy dandy Chabad calendar and realized that this year Hanukah starts the evening of November 27th!!

This may very well be the earliest Hanukah on record.

In order that we not be caught with our dreidels down, here is a tried and true Potato Latke recipe!

Potato Latkes

Ingredients:
5 large potatoes, peeled
1 large onion
4 eggs
⅓ cup matzah meal
1 tsp. salt
¼ tsp. pepper
⅓ cup oil for frying

Method:
Grate potatoes and onion on the fine side of a grater, or in food processor, or in a blender with a little water added to it.
Add eggs and mix well.
Add matzah meal and seasoning and mix well.
Heat oil in frying pan, then add mixture, 1 tablespoon at a time, into the frying pan.
When golden brown, turn over and brown other side.

Latkes can be served with sour cream or applesauce!

Because of the great significance of oil in the history of Hanukah, latkes – potato fritters fried in oil – are usually served.

In Israel, sufganiyot (doughnuts) are commonly served.

Enjoy!

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The Burke Sukkah-Mobile!

Right now, we are in the middle of the Jewish festival of Sukkot. [1]

Just for the person who has to have lunch on the go, my dear friend Steven Burke has come up with his own clever variation of the sukkah-mobile.

Open two car doors, put two 2x4s over the door tops and rest the s’chach on top of the 2x4s!

Voila!

(Image Credit: Steven Burke)

The chochmah and binah demonstrated here is inspirational!

Once again, Necessity is the Mother of Invention!

Bravo, Steven. Yasher Koach! 

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[1]  As commanded in the Bible (Lev. 23:33-44). Christians may know Sukkot by the name Feast of Tabernacles (KJV), Festival of Tabernacles (NIV), Feast of Booths (NASB), etc.

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State of Israel born – May 14, 1948

On 29 November 1947, the United Nations General Assembly recommended the adoption and implementation of the partition plan of  Mandatory Palestine.

On 14 May 1948, David Ben-Gurion, the Executive Head of the World Zionist Organization and president of the Jewish Agency for Palestine, declared “the establishment of a Jewish state in Eretz Israel, to be known as the State of Israel,” a state independent upon the termination of the British Mandate for Palestine, 15 May 1948.

May the Almighty continue to bless and protect Israel.

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Gone for Passover!

Hi, guys…

Passover begins tonight (Monday March 25, 2013) at sunset.

(Baking handmade shmura matza for Passover)

I will be in Toronto for a little over a week.

Have a happy, kosher and joyful Passover.

(The Passover seder table)

I’ll should be back Wednesday April 3.

See you then!

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Going to Israel (2)

On Monday, I arrived in Israel for the first time in my life after so many years… decades… of waiting, hoping, praying.

I came alone.

I knew it was going to be emotional. I knew it was going to be intense.

I was prepared… or so I thought.

It was like being prepared to be hit by a bus… compared to actually being hit by a bus.

When the plane touched down in Tel Aviv, I began weeping. [1]

I could barely stand. Other passengers grabbed their carry on bags and headed out. I was in a daze.

I made my way through a blur of tears. I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to stop. I moved as if in a trance. Was this really happening? Am I in one of the thousands of dreams and daydreams I’ve had over the last 30 or 40 years?

I was nervous about being questioned by Israeli authorities. Who was I? Where was I from? Where was I born? Why was I coming to Israel? Was I Jewish? A Jew with an Italian name? Were my parents Jewish? Did I convert? What rabbinical court converted me? My daughter lives in Israel? She immigrated to Israel? Where does she live? What is her address? Is this my first visit? What prayer does a Jew make when he embarks on a trip? Recite the first line. Do I wear tefillin? When do I wear them? When do I NOT wear them? What was the Torah reading for last Shabbes? What’s the Torah reading for next Shabbes? Was I married? Did I have an aufrufen? Did I read from the Torah? What was the Torah portion? Can I recite the first line from my haftorah portion? What holiday is coming up in 2 weeks? What book is read? Recite the blessings that are read before the book is read. Can you read the first few lines from that book? Do you know the melody that goes with that reading?

I had heard so many stories about Israeli security. I was nervous. I stepped up to the customs officer and handed her my passport.

“What is the purpose of your visit?”

I explained that this was my first visit to Israel and that I came to see my daughter who made aliyah (i.e. emigrated to Israel) a year ago.

“Where does she live?”

I told her she lives in Ramat Gan.

“How long are you going to be in Israel?”

I said I was staying for two weeks, returning on February 25.

The customs officer looked at me for a few moments, sizing me up.

She smiled and handed me back my passport and told me to proceed to baggage claims.

I walked to the baggage claim area and searched for my luggage. A plain black suitcase. My dear friend (and international travel guide) Tracy suggested I attach some brightly-coloured masking tape or cloth to make it distinguishable. I found it. Both wheels were broken off.

I extended the handle and dragged the suitcase behind me as I moved out into the main lobby. I felt numb. It all seemed so unreal. I couldn’t help feeling that I was going to wake up at any moment.

A tall handsome young man with a wide smile. Tomer. My daughter’s boyfriend. He waves and comes to me, giving me a big warm tight hug.

And then I see my beloved daughter. I’ve not laid eyes on her in over a year.

I cry again. I can’t help it. Tomer helps me with my crippled suitcase.

We walk out into the fresh air. I breathe it deep into my lungs.

I’m here. I feel I’ve finally come home to a place to which I’ve never been before.

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[1] Actually, I started crying as soon as I heard the landing gear lowering. 

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The Religions of Westeros (Game of Thrones)

Over the holidays, I ran into this video on the religions of Westeros, the land in which much of George R.R. Martin’s A Game of Thrones [1] is set.

Fascinating clip. For fans of the books and the show and for people interested in religion, this video is a must see.

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[1] A Game of Thrones is the first book in A Song of Ice and Fire, a series of high fantasy novels by American author George R. R. Martin. It has been made into a highly successful television series by HBO.

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Things Orthodox Girls Say (And why I love them)!

When I am in The Heart of the Old World [1], there is a certain pervasive sound you hear… a kind of omnipresent background music… a gently swaying ‘bed track’ to the place. It is a general all-encompassing soundtrack permeating the entire area… made up from the voices of hundreds of Jewish girls and women.

It is useless trying to explain a symphony with words,. I will at least give you a tiny taste of some of the lyrics. Try to imagine the sing-song tones blending in and through each other, above and underneath each other, mixing and intertwining, separating and repeating, like a Bach fugue.

Those who know what I am talking about are well familiar with the melodies, counter-melodies, tempos and keys. To the uninitiated, I can only say that one cannot describe a colour adequately with words… it must be seen to be fully understood. Similarly, like a Shakespearean play, the words are meant to be heard, not read. [2]

At the grocery store, on the sidewalk, in the coffee shop, in the parking lot… it binds us and keeps us together. It forms a warm comforting blanket around us.

And now… let us listen… and hear those precious voices all around us…

Boruch HaShem! Im Yirtzeh HaShem. B’ezras HaShem!

It’s all shtuss. It’s just a bunch of shtuss.

Yes, bli neder. Absolutely, bli neder! Of course, bli neder!

 Make a brochah, Shmuley. Did you make an after-brochah?

Chas v’sholom! K’neine hora! Lo aleinu!

You hold by that? We don’t hold by that! Who holds by that?

Look at that punim! What a shayna punim! Can you believe the punim on this kid?

Where are you for Shabbes lunch? You’re coming for Shabbes dinner, right?

Where does he daven? What time do they finish davening over there?

She lives in Beit Shemesh now. Ramat Gan. She’s in Bnei Barak.

Monsey. Crown Heights. Lakewood. Boro Park.

She’s engaged? Who’s engaged? She’s getting married!

Mazel tov! How wonderful! They should know only joy and happiness.

Simchas. Only Simchas! Next by you. It should happen by you.

Narishkeit. I’ve never heard such narishkeit!

Really? You’re serious? You’re not serious. You are? Really?

When’s shkiah? What time is shkiah? When’s candle lighting?

What time’s Shabbes over? Come over for havdalah!

She’s a giyeres. They’re baalei tshuvah. Frum from birth.

They’re moving to Atlanta.  It’s a very nice community there.

As my Bubbie, olav hasholom, would day, “It’s from fainting!”

Are you ready for Pesach? Oy, please. Don’t remind me!

Where do you get your challah? You make your own!?

I buy frozen gefilte fish and bake it! It’s mamish ok.

We have an aufruffen to go to. I’m at a bar mitzvah.

Nu? Shoyn? Oy, a broch! Vey iz mir!

Zeit nisht meshiggah!

Genig shoyn. Enough, already!

Again with the shtuss?

In the Heart of the Old World, as it is in any Jewish neighbourhood, this is the soundtrack to our lives!

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[1] Bathurst Street in Toronto, between Lawrence and Wilson.

[2] This YouTube video, Shduss Frum Girls Say, although a comic look at the subject, gives you sort of a taste…

As does the second video in the series, Shduss Frum Girls Say 2…

And how can we leave out Passover Shtuss??…

These videos are the work of Zehava G, whose works can be found on YouTube at…

http://www.youtube.com/user/wllwrk4food?feature=plcp

Or on Facebook, at…

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Zehava-G/137144146317809?ref=h­l

Zehava… you’re the best!

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Why I Miss The South (Part 9): Church Message Boards

You see church message boards everywhere, each one trying to out-clever the next with cute sayings.

See what I mean?

Or something like this…

Plays on words. Puns. Cute sayings that will catch your eye when you drive by.

They’re everywhere. Some are groaners. Some bring a genuine smile to your lips.

Some even attempt some nerd humour.

Or try to be internet savvy.

And then… you get to The South!

Yeah, there’s a kind of plain-spoken directness to the messages some churches make down there.

Southerners tend not to mince words.

They kinda cut right to the chase, is what I’m trying to say.

To be sure, not all churches in The South put up messages like these ones.

It’s just that sometimes, it sure does seem like they do!

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