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Archive for the ‘Humour’ Category

Bacon.

avocado(Bacon-wrapped avocado)

Yes. Bacon.

bacon-bowl

Again.

bacon-opoly(Saw this at Bass Pro Shops – couldn’t resist!)

Sorry, boys and girls.

bun(Bacon as bun!)

I know it’s been an unconscionably long time since my last blog.

IMG_6062

I’ve been busy.

end-violence

Like ‘nuts’ busy.

coconut-bacon(Original? There’s more than one?)

Not to worry, though.

explosion(An explosion of bacon!)

I swore to myself that the first thing I would do…

first-aid(In case of emergency, administer bacon!)

Once I got back to the old blog site…
frosting

 

 

(Because nothing says ‘birthday’ like bacon frosting!)

Was give you a bacon update!

garfield-bacon(Bacon has few fans as loyal as Garfield!)

And here it is.

house(Home sweet home!)

Just for you.

kosher-bacon-chips(Check out the bottom left corner. COR! It’s kosher!)

Enjoy.

low-carb-gluten-free

I’d say, “It’s good for you!”…

no-pig-bacon(Who’s behind this anarchist movement?)

But we all know I’d be toying with the truth.

super-power

Just when you thought the end was near…

sushi

And you’d given up all hope…

tooth-fairy

More bacon photos!

gold(Gold sprinkled bacon)

 

It gives life a sense of purpose.

jello(As far as I can tell, this is bacon/cheese jello)

OK, a few more.

weave-taco(Weave bacon taco!)

That bacon taco deserves another photo.

weave-choco-taco(Bacon taco with chocolate sauce and peanuts!)

I’ve been away for a while.

soap(Manly, yes. But I like it too!)

And I have a lot of bacon photos!

spam(Bacon wrapped spam!)

And when I say, “a lot”…

work-hard-be-kind

I mean “a lot!”

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Saw this ‘Irrational Element Table’ just now and it made the iced tea come up my nose!

The Periodic Table of Irrational Nonsense!

Irrational-elements

For the full interactive version, click here!

I love nerd humour!

Thanks to the amazing Crispian Jago for this gem.

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 Bacon by any other Name would Smell as Sweet

stacked

 

Yes, kiddie-winkers…

needs-more-bacon

Boys and girls…

bacon-pancake-dippers

It’s time again to delve into my bacon fascination.

bacon-cinnamon-rolls

For those new to these posts…

bacon-wrapped-fries

I need to make something clear…

bacon-wrapped-onion-rings

I am not obsessed with bacon, per se.

beer-candied-bacon

I am, however, fascinated by people’s obsession with bacon…

MMs

And the myriad ways that obsession expresses itself.

bacon-rimmed-caesar

Here are but a few examples…

ausie-gator-bacon

Some more alarming than others!

pillow

There seems to be no limit to how bacon can be inserted into people’s daily lives…

bacon-cupcakes

As well as their tummies.

cupcakes

The range of bacon uses is only limited…

bacon-lollipops-s(Saw these bacon lollipops sold at my local 7-11!)

By the imagination of  the bacon users…

let-there-be

And, presumably, the pork marketing boards.

women-like-bacon

They provide bacon lovers…

pig-dog

And those of us who study them…

better

Countless hours of harmless fun…

car(Wouldn’t this make the ideal bacon food cart?)

As bacon sits there…

squeez-bacon

On a plate…

no-pork-bacon

Waiting to kill them.

seeds

Have fun!

updates

 

And most of all…

bass-bacon-music

Enjoy!

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Thank you once again to the many friends & readers who have sent me bacon-related photos and suggestions.

I couldn’t have done it without you… or people very much like you.

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A well-read morning pick-me-up!

literary-coffee

Have a wonderful day!

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Thanks to the Caffeina Festival Facebook page.

Thanks also to the lovely and talented Francesca Charlotte Ventresca, one of my most adorable relatives.

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Most women are pretty darned sure that most men are crazy.

men-1

But do we have to prove it to them so darned often?

men-2

I mean really.

men-3

Come on, guys!

men-4

We’re making it far to easy for them!

men-5

We could at least let’s try to make it challenging.

men-6

But noooooo!!

men-7

Get a grip, men.

men-8

Let’s not hand it to them on a silver platter.

men-9

Please?

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Normally, one wouldn’t think insults would be a source of fondness and nostalgia.

The way phrases are turned in The South makes you rethink all of your notions about enjoying otherwise unpleasant things.

Here are a handful of my favourites…

Back in Papaw’s day, they would have kept him upstairs.

He ain’t hooked up right.

fiddle-possum

He’s about half a bubble off plumb.

His cheese done slid right off his cracker.

I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.

I wonder what she would charge to haunt a house.

No decent woman can afford to be seen with him.

fluent-redneck

‘Nough to gag a maggot.

She talks just to hear her head rattle.

She’s three pickles shy of a quart.

That man ain’t got the decency to die.

You’ll have to look over him, he ain’t had no home trainin’.

popcorn-sutton-moonshine(The Late Great Popcorn Sutton – bootlegger)

Your hair looks pretty good but your clothes needs something done.

She could start an argument in an empty house.

That girl’s not wearing enough fabric to flag down a train.

He’s old as sin and twice as ugly.

You lie like a dirty cur dog.

shoot-deer-motel

That dress is ugly as homemade sin.

He don’t got all what belongs to him.

She has her nose so high in the air she could drown in a rainstorm.

He’s as windy as a sack full of farts.

He’s country as a bowl of grits.

far-wood

He’s 10 pounds of manure in a 5 pound bag.

Useless as a screen door (or cat flap) on a submarine.

She looks like Death suckin’ a sponge.

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Here are three of the most effective yet subtle insults. When said properly, they can be devastating. And if you’re not from The South, you probably won’t even know you’re being insulted…

You’re not from around here, are you?

Bless your heart.

That’s nice.

bless-your-heart

Thenk yew!

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Nothing says love like a bouquet of roses…

daryl-dixon-bouquet

From Daryl Dixon!

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The knight and his steed.

froggy-back(© Nicolas Reusens)

A tropical capture in Costa Rica.

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The 2014 Sony World Photography Awards.

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I know it’s stupid. I know it’s childish and nerdy but…

This cracks me up.

gravity-put-down

I mean, really.

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Are You Old Enough to Get This Joke?

old-joke

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