Most loonies with whom I have lunched are, as a general rule, positive, good-natured people.
With one notable exception…
Alyssa Krabbykova , the world’s crabbiest girl.
Alyssa is grumpy ALL THE TIME.
She lifts grouchy it to an art form.
Alyssa wakes up crabby. How is that possible? How does one wake up crabby? Nothing has happened yet!
And yet, people still love Alyssa despite her foul mood. Probably because of it.
I think part of it has to do with the fact that she is completely honest. She doesn’t put on the fake smile and the phony friendliness. When you talk with her, you get the genuine article – the Full Frontal Alyssa.
There’s something oddly disarming about that.
Alyssa used to work at my old hangout and office, The Café on Main. I swear, customers would come there, in part, to see if Alyssa would be more bored, impatient, frustrated, grouchy… in other words, even crabbier… than the day before. She rarely disappointed them.
I would like to think that most young ladies in the food service industry try to be pleasant, cheerful, friendly, etc, in order to make the customer happy. Alyssa adopted more of an ‘eat it and beat it’ philosophy. To her, customers were an annoying nuisance standing between her and the end of the day.
I am hoping to have the sincere pleasure of getting together with Alyssa later this week. I haven’t seen her in a while and I am wondering if time has mellowed the girl a bit. I don’t think I need worry. I am sure she will be every bit as crabby as she ever was.
Here’s to things never changing!
I miss you, Alyssa. Things just aren’t the same without your little bitter ray of sunshine.
 ‘Krabbykova’ is not her real surname. But it should be.